This was to me a very serious subject of
self-gratulation, for, besides my instinctive
dread of becoming the topic of the speculations
of gossip, I felt that if the situation
which I occupied in relation to him were
made publicly known, I should stand
committed in a manner which would scarcely
leave me the power of retraction.

The period at which Lord Glenfallen
had arranged to visit Ashtown House was
now fast approaching, and it became my
mother's wish to form me thoroughly to
her will, and to obtain my consent to the
proposed marriage before his arrival, so
that all things might proceed smoothly,
without apparent opposition or objection
upon my part. Whatever objections, therefore,
I had entertained were to be subdued;
whatever disposition to resistance I
had exhibited or had been supposed to
feel, were to be completely eradicated before
he made his appearance; and my mother
addressed herself to the task with a
decision and energy against which even the
barriers, which her imagination had created,
could hardly have stood.

If she had, however, expected any
determined opposition from me, she was agree-