Ardath by Marie Corelli
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page 23 of 769 (02%)
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taut thirty, I feel an alder-elde of accumulated centuries upon
me--when I was young, the dream of my life was Poesy. Perhaps I inherited the fatal love of it from my mother--she was a Greek-and she had a subtle music in her that nothing could quell, not even my father's English coldness. She named me Theos, little guessing what a dreary sarcasm that name would prove! It was well, I think, that she died early." "Well for her, but perhaps not so well for you," said Heliobas with a keen, kindly glance at him. Alwyn sighed. "Nay, well, for us both,--for I should have chafed at her loving restraint, and she would unquestionably have been disappointed in me. My father was a conscientious, methodical business man, who spent all his days up to almost the last moment of his life in amassing money, though it never gave him any joy so far as I could see, and when at his death I became sole possessor of his hardly-earned fortune, I felt far more sorrow than satisfaction. I wished he had spent his gold on himself and left me poor, for it seemed to me I had need of nothing save the little I earned by my pen--I was content to live an anchorite and dine off a crust for the sake of the divine Muse I worshipped. Fate, however, willed it otherwise,--and though I scarcely cared for the wealth I inherited, it gave me at least one blessing--that of perfect independence. I was free to follow my own chosen vocation, and for a brief wondering while I deemed myself happy, ... happy as Keats must have been when the fragment of 'Hyperion' broke from his frail life as thunder breaks from a summer-cloud. I was as a monarch swaying a sceptre that commanded both earth and heaven; a kingdom was mine-a kingdom of golden ether, peopled with |
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