one; only I quite spoilt all my hospitality for a long time by my
fanatical agitation for a water diet and my polemics against the
evils of wine and other intoxicating drinks. I adopted what
seemed almost a new kind of religion: when I was driven into a
corner by Sulzer and Herwegh, the latter of whom prided himself
on his knowledge of chemistry and physiology, about the absurdity
of Rausse's theory of the poisonous qualities contained in wine,
I found refuge in the moral and aesthetic motive which made me
regard the enjoyment of wine as an evil and barbarous substitute
for the ecstatic state of mind which love alone should produce. I
maintained that wine, even if not taken in excess, contained
qualities producing a state of intoxication which a man sought in
order to raise his spirits, but that only he who experienced the
intoxication of love could raise his spirits in the noblest sense
of the word. This led to a discussion on the modern relations of
the sexes, whereupon I commented on the almost brutal manner in
which men kept aloof from women in Switzerland. Sulzer said he
would not at all object to the intoxication resulting from
intercourse with women, but in his opinion the difficulty lay in
procuring this by fair means. Herwegh was inclined to agree with
my paradox, but remarked that wine had nothing whatever to do
with it, that it was simply an excellent and strengthening food,
which, according to Anacreon, agreed very well with the ecstasy
of love. As my friends studied me and my condition more closely,
they felt they had reason to be very anxious about my foolish and
obstinate extravagances. I looked terribly pale and thin; I
hardly slept at all, and in everything I did I betrayed a strange
excitement. Although eventually sleep almost entirely forsook me,
I still pretended that I had never been so well or so cheerful in
my life, and I continued on the coldest winter mornings to take