worse through my acquaintance with that dreadful theatre--all
these wrong views now sank down as if into an abyss of shame and
remorse.

This inner change had been gradually prepared by many painful
experiences during the last few years. I owed the recovery of my
old vigour and spirits to the deep impression the rendering of
the Ninth Symphony had made on me when performed in a way I had
never dreamed of. This important event in my life can only be
compared to the upheaval caused within me when, as a youth of
sixteen, I saw Schroder-Devrient act in Fidelio.

The direct result of this was my intense longing to compose
something that would give me a similar feeling of satisfaction,
and this desire grew in proportion to my anxiety about my
unfortunate position in Paris, which made me almost despair of
success.

In this mood I sketched an overture to Faust which, according to
my original scheme, was only to form the first part of a whole
Faust Symphony, as I had already got the 'Gretchen' idea in my
head for the second movement. This is the same composition that I
rewrote in several parts fifteen years later; I had forgotten all
about it, and I owed its reconstruction to the advice of Liszt,
who gave me many valuable hints. This composition has been
performed many times under the title of eine Faust-ouverture, and
has met with great appreciation. At the time of which I am
speaking, I hoped that the Conservatoire orchestra would have
been willing to give the work a hearing, but I was told they
thought they had done enough for me, and hoped to be rid of me