My detested companion looked at me indignantly, and whispered, "Can
you endure this? Have you no blood in your veins?" He instantly
pricked my finger, which bled. "Yes, positively," he exclaimed,
"you have some blood left!--come, sign." The parchment and pen were
in my hand!



CHAPTER IV.



I submit myself to thy judgment, my dear Chamisso; I do not seek to
bias it. I have long been a rigid censor of myself, and nourished
at my heart the worm of remorse. This critical moment of my life is
ever present to my soul, and I dare only cast a hesitating glance at
it, with a deep sense of humiliation and grief. Ah, my dear friend,
he who once permits himself thoughtlessly to deviate but one step
from the right road, will imperceptibly find himself involved in
various intricate paths, all leading him farther and farther astray.
In vain he beholds the guiding-stars of Heaven shining before him.
No choice is left him--he must descend the precipice, and offer
himself up a sacrifice to his fate. After the false step which I
had rashly made, and which entailed a curse upon me, I had, in the
wantonness of passion, entangled one in my fate who had staked all
her happiness upon me. What was left for me to do in a case where I
had brought another into misery, but to make a desperate leap in the
dark to save her ?--the last, the only means of rescue presented
itself. Think not so meanly of me, Chamisso, as to imagine that I
would have shrunk from any sacrifice on my part. In such a case it