'trusted leader of Australian thought'. There were two policemen at
the door, and I hoped they took note of that testimonial. Then Sir
Harry started.

I never heard anything like it. He didn't begin to know how to
talk. He had about a bushel of notes from which he read, and when
he let go of them he fell into one prolonged stutter. Every now and
then he remembered a phrase he had learned by heart, straightened
his back, and gave it off like Henry Irving, and the next moment he
was bent double and crooning over his papers. It was the most
appalling rot, too. He talked about the 'German menace', and said
it was all a Tory invention to cheat the poor of their rights and
keep back the great flood of social reform, but that 'organized
labour' realized this and laughed the Tories to scorn. He was all for
reducing our Navy as a proof of our good faith, and then sending
Germany an ultimatum telling her to do the same or we would
knock her into a cocked hat. He said that, but for the Tories,
Germany and Britain would be fellow-workers in peace and reform.
I thought of the little black book in my pocket! A giddy lot Scudder's
friends cared for peace and reform.

Yet in a queer way I liked the speech. You could see the niceness
of the chap shining out behind the muck with which he had been
spoon-fed. Also it took a load off my mind. I mightn't be much of
an orator, but I was a thousand per cent better than Sir Harry.

I didn't get on so badly when it came to my turn. I simply told
them all I could remember about Australia, praying there should be
no Australian there--all about its labour party and emigration and
universal service. I doubt if I remembered to mention Free Trade,