If, for example, you have a stain upon your cheek which
rivals in brilliancy the best Chateau-Margout; or, are
afflicted with a nose whose lustre dims the ruby, you may
employ such hues of dress, that the eye, instead of being
shocked by the strangeness of the defect, will be charmed by
the graceful harmony of the colours. Every one cannot indeed
be an Adonis, but it is his own fault if he is an Esop.

If you have bad, squinting eyes, which have lost their lashes
and are bordered with red, you should wear spectacles. If the
defect be great, your glasses should be coloured. In such
cases emulate the sky rather than the sea: green spectacles
are an abomination, fitted only for students in divinity,--
blue ones are respectable and even _distingue._

Almost every defect of face may be concealed by a judicious
use and arrangement of hair. Take care, however, that your
hair be not of one colour and your whiskers of another; and
let your wig be large enough to cover the _whole_ of your red
or white hair.

It is evident, therefore, that though a man may be ugly,
there is no necessity for his being shocking. Would that all
men were convinced of this! I verily believe that if Mr. --
in his walking-dress, and Mr. -- in his evening costume were
to meet alone, in some solitary place, where there was
nothing to divert their attention from one another, they
would expire of mutual hideousness.