The Philosophy of Style by Herbert Spencer
page 20 of 44 (45%)
page 20 of 44 (45%)
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it be remodeled to agree with the particulars afterwards mentioned;
but to do a little of each. Take a case. It is desirable to avoid so extremely indirect an arrangement as the following:--"We came to our journey's end, at last, with no small difficulty after much fatigue, through deep roads, and bad weather." Yet to transform this into an entirely direct sentence would not produce a satisfactory effect; as witness:--"At last, with no small difficulty, after much fatigue, through deep roads, and bad weather, we came to our journey's end." 31. Dr. Whately, from whom we quote the first of these two arrangements,' proposes this construction:--"At last, after much fatigue, through deep roads and bad weather, we came, with no small difficulty, to our journey's end." Here it will be observed that by introducing the words "we came" a little earlier in the sentence, the labour of carrying forward so many particulars is diminished, and the subsequent qualification "with no small difficulty" entails an addition to the thought that is very easily made. But a further improvement may be produced by introducing the words "we came" still earlier; especially if at the same time the qualifications be rearranged in conformity with the principle already explained, that the more abstract elements of the thought should come before the more concrete. Observe the better effect obtained by making these two changes:--"At last, with no small difficulty, and after much fatigue, we came, through deep roads and bad weather, to our journey's end." This reads with comparative smoothness; that is, with less hindrance from suspensions and reconstructions of thought--with less mental effort. 32. Before dismissing this branch of our subject, it should |
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