best way to reform a reformer is to rob him. The minute he finds out
he's been robbed he turns over a new leaf and begins to beller like
a bull about how rotten the police are. Ninety nine times out of a
hundred he quits his cussed interferin' with the law and becomes a
decent, law-observin' citizen. Our scheme is to get busy as soon as
we've been turned loose and while our so-called benefactors are
still rejoicin' over havin' snatched a brand from the burnin', we up
and show 'em the error of their ways. First offenders get off fairly
easy. We simply sneak in and take their silver and some loose
jewelry. The more hardened they are, the worse we treat 'em. Eing
leaders some times get beat up so badly it's impossible to identify
'em at the morgue. But in time we'll smash the gang, and then if a
feller goes up for ten, twenty or even thirty years he'll know
there's no underhanded work goin' on and he can settle down to an
honest life. The only way to stop crime in this country, Mr. Yollop,
is to--"

"Thank you."

"--is to make EVERYBODY respect the law. And with conditions so
pleasant and so happy in the prison I want to tell you there's
nobody in the country that respects and admires the law more than we
do,--'specially us fellers that remember what the penitentiaries
used to be like a few years ago when conditions were so tough that
most of us managed to earn an honest livin' outside sooner than run
the risk of gettin' sent up." He sighed deeply. Then with a trace of
real solicitude in his manner: "Are your feet warm yet?"

"Warm as toast. Your discourse, Cassius, has moved me deeply.
Perhaps it would comfort you to call up police headquarters again