spent it in sighs and tears. So when the morning was come, they
would know how he did; he told them, worse and worse; he also set
to talking to them again, but they began to be hardened. They also
thought to drive away his distemper by harsh and surly carriages
to him. Sometimes they would deride, sometimes they would chide,
and sometimes they would quite neglect him. Wherefore he began
to retire himself to his chamber to pray for, and pity them, and
also to condole his own misery. He would also walk solitarily in
the fields, sometimes reading, and sometimes praying; and thus
for some days he spent his time.[5]

Now I saw upon a time, when he was walking in the fields, that he
was, as he was wont, reading in his book, and greatly distressed
in his mind; and as he read, he burst out, as he had done before,
crying, "What shall I do to be saved?" (Acts 16:30, 31).

I saw also that he looked this way and that way, as if he would
run; yet he stood still, because, as I perceived, he could not tell
which way to go.[6] I looked then, and saw a man named Evangelist
coming to him, who asked, "Where fore dost thou cry?"

He answered, Sir, I perceive, by the book in my hand, that I am
condemned to die, and after that to come to judgment, (Heb. 9:27);
and I find that I am not willing (Job 16:21, 22) to do the first,
nor able (Eze. 22:14) to do the second.

Then said Evangelist, Why not willing to die, since this life
is attended with so many evils? The man answered, Because I fear
that this burden that is upon my back will sink me lower than the
grave; and I shall fall into Tophet (Isa. 30:33). And, Sir, if