dear wife woke at six, and saw Prettyman's dirty boots at her
bedside. And where was the wretch, her husband? Why, he was
drinking downstairs--swilling. Yes; worse than a midnight robber,
he'd taken the keys out of his dear wife's pockets--ha! what that
poor creature has to bear!--and had got at the brandy. A pretty
thing for a wife to wake at six in the morning, and instead of her
husband to see his dirty boots!

"But I'll not be made your victim, Mr. Caudle, not I. You shall
never get at my keys, for they shall lie under my pillow--under my
own head, Mr. Caudle.

"You'll be ruined, but if I can help it, you shall ruin nobody but
yourself.

"Oh, that hor--hor--hor--i--ble tob--ac--co!"


To this lecture, Caudle affixes no comment. A certain proof, we
think, that the man had nothing to say for himself.



LECTURE III--MR. CAUDLE JOINS A CLUB--"THE SKYLARKS."



"Well, if a woman hadn't better be in her grave than be married!
That is, if she can't be married to a decent man. No; I don't care
if you are tired, I SHAN'T let you go to sleep. No, and I won't say