I know. Pretty places! And you a married man and the father of a
family. No: I won't hold my tongue. It's very well for you to
threaten to get up. You're to go to Greenwich Fair, and race up and
down the hill, and play at kiss in the ring. Pah! it's disgusting,
Mr. Caudle. Oh, I dare say you DID play at it; if you didn't, you'd
have liked, and that's just as bad;--and you can go into swings, and
shows, and roundabouts. If I was you, I should hide my head under
the clothes and be ashamed of myself.

"And what is most selfish--most mean of you, Caudle--you can go and
enjoy yourself, and never so much as bring home for the poor children
a gingerbread nut. Don't tell me that your pocket was picked of a
pound of nuts! Nice company you must have been in to have your
pocket picked.

"But I daresay I shall hear all about it to-morrow. I've no doubt,
sir, you were dancing at the Crown and Anchor. I should like to have
seen you. No: I'm not making myself ridiculous. It's you that's
making yourself ridiculous; and everybody that knows you says so.
Everybody knows what I have to put up with from you.

"Going to a fair, indeed! At your time--"


"Here," says Caudle, "I dozed off hearing confusedly the words--hill-
-gipsies--rattles--roundabouts--swings--pink bonnet--nuts."



LECTURE X--ON MR. CAUDLE'S SHIRT-BUTTONS