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Pamela, or Virtue Rewarded by Samuel Richardson
page 17 of 682 (02%)
many weeks; but a sad, sad scene, has been the occasion of it. For to be
sure, now it is too plain, that all your cautions were well grounded. O
my dear mother! I am miserable, truly miserable!--But yet, don't be
frightened, I am honest!--God, of his goodness, keep me so!

O this angel of a master! this fine gentleman! this gracious benefactor
to your poor Pamela! who was to take care of me at the prayer of his good
dying mother; who was so apprehensive for me, lest I should be drawn in
by Lord Davers's nephew, that he would not let me go to Lady Davers's:
This very gentleman (yes, I must call him gentleman, though he has fallen
from the merit of that title) has degraded himself to offer freedoms to
his poor servant! He has now shewed himself in his true colours; and, to
me, nothing appear so black, and so frightful.

I have not been idle; but had writ from time to time, how he, by sly mean
degrees, exposed his wicked views; but somebody stole my letter, and I
know not what has become of it. It was a very long one. I fear, he that
was mean enough to do bad things, in one respect, did not stick at this.
But be it as it will, all the use he can make of it will be, that he may
be ashamed of his part; I not of mine: for he will see I was resolved to
be virtuous, and gloried in the honesty of my poor parents.

I will tell you all, the next opportunity; for I am watched very
narrowly; and he says to Mrs. Jervis, This girl is always scribbling; I
think she may be better employed. And yet I work all hours with my
needle, upon his linen, and the fine linen of the family; and am,
besides, about flowering him a waistcoat.--But, oh! my heart's broke
almost; for what am I likely to have for my reward, but shame and
disgrace, or else ill words, and hard treatment! I'll tell you all soon,
and hope I shall find my long letter.
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