Spanish bonds which, when information was disclosed which he
possessed, were certain to rise twenty per cent. If what he said
was true--and I had no reason to doubt him--I could easily get back
without much risk about two-thirds of the money I had lost. Had I
been in full work, I do not believe I should have wasted a shilling
on the speculation, but the excitement attracted me, and I ventured
a considerable sum. In about a fortnight there was a sudden jump of
two per cent. in my securities, and I was so much elated that I
determined to go farther. I doubled my stake; in three weeks
another rise was announced; I again increased the investment, and
now I watched the market with feverish eagerness. One day I was
downstairs a quarter of an hour earlier than usual waiting for the
boy who brought the paper.

I tore it open and to my horror saw that there was a panic on the
Stock Exchange; my bonds were worthless, and I was ruined.

I had always secretly feared that this would happen, and that I
should be so distracted as to lose my reason. To my surprise, I was
never more self-possessed, and I was not so miserable as might have
been expected. I at once gave notice of discharge to my servants,
sold nearly all my furniture and let my house. I was offered help,
but declined it. I moved into a little villa in one of the new
roads then being made at Brixton, and found that I possessed a
capital which, placed in Consols--for I would not trust anything but
the public funds--brought me one hundred and twenty-five pounds a
year. This was not enough for my niece, myself and a maid, and I
was forced to consider whether I could not obtain some employment.
To return to Eastcheap was clearly out of the question, but there
was a possibility, although I was fifty-six, that my experience