missed the opportunity of seeing Rachel, just as I missed many other
opportunities of more importance. Oh! when I look back now over my
life and call to mind what I might have had simply for taking and
did not take, my heart is like to break. The curse for me has not
been plucking forbidden fruit, but the refusal of divine fruit
offered me by heavenly angels.

Mrs. A.'s circle of acquaintances widened during the two or three
years of my friendship with her. She often pressed me to meet them,
but I nearly always held back. I told her that I did not care for
mere acquaintances, and that certainly not more than one or two of
her visitors would shed a tear if they heard she was dead. 'To
possess one or two friends,' she said, 'who would weep at my
departure would be quite enough. It is as much as anybody ought to
demand, but you are mistaken in supposing that those who would not
break their hearts for us may not be of value, and even precious.
We are so made that the attraction which unites us to our fellow-
creatures is, and ought to be, of varying intensity, and there is
something to be obtained from a weaker bond which is not to be had
from a stronger. I like the society of Mrs. Arnold and Madame
Sorel. I enjoy the courtesy which is not slipper-and-dressing-gown
familiarity, and their way of looking at things, especially Madame
Sorel's, is different from mine and instructs me. Forgive me for
reminding you that in our Father's house are many mansions, and if
we wish to be admitted to some of them we must wear our best
clothes, and when we are inside we must put on our company manners.'
She was quite right; Mrs. Arnold and Madame Sorel could have given
me just what I needed.

My visits to Mrs. A. became less and less frequent, and at last