"When I got downstairs, who should be there but a fat porter, with a
knot, on which he carried"--(Poulterer) "a pound of pork sausages."

"'Hallo!' said I, 'my fellow, what do you want at this time of day?' He
answered"--(Fishmonger) "'A cod's head and shoulders.'"

"'Get along with you,' I said; 'there's my neighbor, Dr. Drenchall, I see,
wants'"--(Butcher) "'a sheep's head.'"

"I now went up to shave, but my soap-dish was gone, and the maid brought
me instead"--(Milliner) "a lady's chip hat."

"My razor had been taken to chop firewood, so I used"--(Greengrocer)
"a cucumber."

"I then washed my face in"--(Doctor) "a cup of quinine," "cleaned my
teeth with"--(Fishmonger) "a fresh herring," and "combed my hair
with"--(Pastrycook) "a jam tart."

"My best coat was taken possession of by pussy and kittens, so I whipped
on"--(Hardware-man) "a dripping pan."

"The monkey, seeing how funny I looked, snatched off my wig, and clapped
on my head"--(Poulterer) "a fat hen."

"I now awoke my wife, and asked her what she had nice for breakfast;
she said"--(Doctor) "a mustard plaster."

"Then I scolded Sukey, the servant, and called her"--(Poulterer) "a