torture chamber. My first impression was one of astonished disgust
because of the hideousness of the ink-stained walls, and of the old
benches of shiny wood defaced by the penknife carvings of countless
school-boys who had been so inexpressibly miserable in this place.
Although I was a stranger to my new companions they treated me with the
greatest familiarity (they used thee and thou in addressing me) and gave
themselves patronizing airs that were almost impertinent. Although I
observed my school-mates timidly and furtively I thought them, for the
most part, exceedingly ill-mannered and untidy.

As I was twelve and a half I entered the third class; my tutor
considered me advanced enough to keep up with it if I chose to do so,
although I myself felt that I was scarcely equal to the task. The first
day, for the purpose of qualifying, we had to write Latin exercises, and
I remember that my father awaited, with some anxiety, the outcome of the
examination. When I told him I was second among fifteen I was surprised
that he attached so much importance to a matter of so little interest
to me. It was all one to me! Broken hearted as I felt, how could I be
affected by such a trifle?

Later, indeed, at no time, did I feel the impetus that the desire to
excel brings with it. To be at the foot of the class always seemed to me
the least of the ills that a school-boy is called upon to endure.

The weeks following my entrance were extremely painful to me. I felt my
intellect cramping rather than expanding under the multiplicity of the
lessons and the tasks imposed; even the realm of my young dreams seemed
closing against me little by little. The first dismal, foggy weather,
and the first gray days added a greater desolation and sadness to my
already overwrought feelings. The uncouth chimney-sweeps had returned,