'But with what an object! Can any expenditure be called excessive which
enables us to hear Comrade Waller being mordant and ironical at the
other end?'

'It's a rum business,' said Mike. 'I hope the dickens he won't mix us
up in it. We should look frightful fools.'

'I may possibly say a few words,' said Psmith carelessly, 'if the
spirit moves me. Who am I that I should deny people a simple pleasure?'

Mike looked alarmed.

'Look here,' he said, 'I say, if you _are_ going to play the goat,
for goodness' sake don't go lugging me into it. I've got heaps of
troubles without that.'

Psmith waved the objection aside.

'You,' he said, 'will be one of the large, and, I hope, interested
audience. Nothing more. But it is quite possible that the spirit may
not move me. I may not feel inspired to speak. I am not one of those
who love speaking for speaking's sake. If I have no message for the
many-headed, I shall remain silent.'

'Then I hope the dickens you won't have,' said Mike. Of all things he
hated most being conspicuous before a crowd--except at cricket, which
was a different thing--and he had an uneasy feeling that Psmith would
rather like it than otherwise.