a beard, when you have none yourself.'

When Sidonius, who had a great reputation at Athens as a teacher,
was boasting that he was conversant with all the philosophic
systems--but I had better quote his words. 'Let Aristotle call, and
I follow to the Lyceum; Plato, and I hurry to the Academy; Zeno,
and I make my home in the Porch; Pythagoras, and I keep the rule of
silence.' Then rose Demonax from among the audience: 'Sidonius,
Pythagoras calls.'

A pretty girlish young man called Python, son of some Macedonian
grandee, once by way of quizzing him asked a riddling question and
invited him to show his acumen over it. 'I only see one thing, dear
child,' he said, 'and that is, that you are a _fair_ logician.'
The other lost his temper at this equivoque, and threatened him:
'You shall see in a minute what a man can do.' 'Oh, you keep a man,
do you?' was Demonax's smiling retort.

He once, for daring to laugh at an athlete who displayed himself in
gay clothes because he had won an Olympic victory, received a blow
on the head with a stone, which drew blood. The bystanders were all
as angry as if they had themselves been the victims, and set up a
shout--'The Proconsul! the Proconsul!' 'Thank you, gentlemen,' said
Demonax, 'but I should prefer the doctor.'

He once picked up a little gold charm in the road as he walked, and
posted a notice in the market-place stating that the loser could
recover his property, if he would call upon Demonax and give
particulars of the weight, material, and workmanship. A handsome
young exquisite came, professing to have lost it. The philosopher