'Don't, Babe, please!' said Dallas. 'You've no idea how a remark of
that sort infuriates us. You surely don't suppose we'd have the man in
the study if we could help it?'

'It's another instance of Ward at his worst,' said Vaughan. 'Have you
never heard the story of the Mutual Friend's arrival?'

'No.'

'It was like this. At the beginning of this term I came back expecting
to be head of this show. You see, Richards left at Christmas and I was
next man in. Dallas and I had made all sorts of arrangements for having
a good time. Well, I got back on the last evening of the holidays. When
I got into this study, there was the man Plunkett sitting in the best
chair, reading.'

'Probably reading Herodotus in the original Greek,' snorted Dallas.

'He didn't take the slightest notice of me. I stood in the doorway like
Patience on a monument for about a quarter of an hour. Then I coughed.
He took absolutely no notice. I coughed again, loud enough to crack the
windows. Then I got tired of it, and said "Hullo". He did look up at
that. "Hullo," he said, "you've got rather a nasty cough." I said
"Yes", and waited for him to throw himself on my bosom and explain
everything, you know.'

'Did he?' asked the Babe, deeply interested.

'Not a bit,' said Dallas, 'he--sorry, Vaughan, fire ahead.'