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The Swoop by P. G. (Pelham Grenville) Wodehouse
page 39 of 85 (45%)
dances. But the thing had to be done, so it was as well to get it over.
When the last movement had been completed, he raised his hand.

"Men," he said, in his clear, penetrating alto, "although you have not
the same facilities as myself for hearing the latest news, you are all,
by this time, doubtless aware that this England of ours lies 'neath the
proud foot of a conqueror. It is for us to save her. (Cheers, and a
voice "Invooboo!") I would call on you here and now to seize your
hockey-sticks and rush upon the invader, were it not, alas! that such
an action would merely result in your destruction. At present the
invader is too strong. We must wait; and something tells me that we
shall not have to wait long. (Applause.) Jealousy is beginning to
spring up between the Russians and the Germans. It will be our task to
aggravate this feeling. With our perfect organisation this should be
easy. Sooner or later this smouldering jealousy is going to burst into
flame. Any day now," he proceeded, warming as he spoke, "there may be
the dickens of a dust-up between these Johnnies, and then we've got 'em
where the hair's short. See what I mean, you chaps? It's like this. Any
moment they may start scrapping and chaw each other up, and then we'll
simply sail in and knock what's left endways."

A shout of applause went up from the assembled scouts.

"What I am anxious to impress upon you men," concluded Clarence, in
more measured tones, "is that our hour approaches. England looks to us,
and it is for us to see that she does not look in vain. Sedulously
feeding the growing flame of animosity between the component parts of
the invading horde, we may contrive to bring about that actual
disruption. Till that day, see to it that you prepare yourselves for
war. Men, I have finished."
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