Pan by Knut Hamsun
page 42 of 174 (24%)
page 42 of 174 (24%)
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"What is it, Edwarda?" I asked, and I could hear my blood beating; hear it as it were from down in my throat, so that I could not speak distinctly. "Nothing," she answered. "Only--that I wanted to. It doesn't matter." I took off my cap and brushed back my hair mechanically as I stood looking at her. "Doesn't matter...?" Herr Mack was saying something, a good way off; we could not hear his words from where we were. But I was glad to think that Herr Mack had seen nothing, that he knew nothing of this. It was well indeed that he had been away from the party just then. I felt relieved at that, and I stepped over to the others and said with a laugh, and seeming quite indifferent: "I would ask you all to forgive my unseemly behavior a moment ago; I am myself extremely sorry about it. Edwarda kindly offered to change flowers with me, and I forgot myself. I beg her pardon and yours. Put yourself in my place; I live all alone, and am not accustomed to the society of ladies; besides which, I have been drinking wine, and am not used to that either. You must make allowances for that." And I laughed, and showed great indifference to such a trifle, that it might be forgotten; but, inwardly, I was serious. Moreover, what I had said made no impression on Edwarda. She did not try to hide anything, to smooth over the effect of her hasty action: on the contrary, she sat down close to me and kept looking at me fixedly. Now and again she spoke to me. And afterwards, when we were playing "_Enke_," she said: |
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