Before he found them "all wrong," he had a horsy acquaintance in a
judge. This was at a time when he was practising law, which involved
riding on circuit, as the court went round to give sittings like the
ancient English justices, attending assizes. During such excursions,
they played practical jokes, naturally. Among their singular contests
was a bet of twenty-five dollars--as forfeit if, in horse-swapping,
the loser rejected the horse offered on even terms with the one he
"put in." Neither was to know anything of the equine paragon until
simultaneously exhibited.

As good sport was indicated where two such arrant jokers were in
conflict, a vast throng filled the tavern-yard where the pair were to
draw conclusions. At the appointed hour the court functionary dragged
upon the scene a most dilapidated _simulacrum_ of man's noblest
conquest--blind, spavined, lean as Pharaoh's _kind_, creeking in
every joint--at the same time that his fellow wagerer carried on under
his long arm a carpenter's _horse_--gashed with adze and broadax,
bored with the augur, trenched with saw and draw-knife--singed, paint,
and tar-spotted, crazy in each leg of the three still adhering--in
short, justifying Lincoln to reverse his cry at viewing the real
animal:

"Jedge (for judge), this is the first time I ever _got the worst_
of it in a hoss-trade!"


* * * * *


HOW MANY SHORT BREATHS?