it, if the worst came to the worst."

Campbell: "Claret! What Mr. McIlheny requires is forty-rod whiskey in
a solution of sulphuric acid. You must take that, or fourth-proof
brandy straight, with him."

Roberts, miserably: "I couldn't; you know I couldn't."

Campbell: "What are you going to do, then?"

Roberts: "I don't know; I don't know. I--I'll give him in charge to a
policeman."

Campbell: "And make a scandal here?"

Roberts: "Of course it can't be done!"

Campbell: "Of _course_ it can't. Give a councilman in charge? The
policeman will be Irish too, and then what'll you do? You're more
likely to be carried off yourself, when the facts are explained.
They'll have an ugly look in the police report."

Roberts: "Oh, it can't be done! Nothing can be done! I wish Agnes
would come!"

The Colored Man who calls the Trains: "Cars ready for South
Framingham, Whitneys, East Holliston, Holliston, Metcalf's,
Braggville, and Milford. Express to Framingham. Milford Branch. Track
No. 3."