I did not find the Lord at once and the enemy brought discouragement
against my soul. I was just about to come to the conclusion that I would
seek God only a week, and that if I did not find him then I would quit. But
as I walked through the front room, I noticed an old Methodist hymn-book
lying on the stand. I opened it and as God would have it, my eyes fell on
these lines: "And will you basely to the tempter yield?" Going to the
kitchen where Mother was washing, I said, "Mother, there is a hymn in this
book that ought to be torn out." She said, "Why, Mary?" After I had read
the line to her she said, "Mary, can't you adopt the next line as yours?
'No, in the strength of Jesus, no, I never will give up my shield.'" I
decided then and there to seek God until the day of my death, or until I
found him.

My oldest brother and I went to prayer. He asked me to pray, but all I have
ever remembered saying is, "Lord have mercy on me. Lord hear me." He said,
"Mary, the Lord does have mercy on you and the Lord does hear you, or you
could not have prayed as you have been praying." He asked me whether I was
willing to live or die for the Lord; and I said, "I am willing to live, but
I am not willing to die in this condition," He replied, "All the Lord wants
is your will. He will not let you die in this condition when you want to
get saved." But I still persisted that I wasn't willing to die in that
condition.

Then the enemy tried to bring confusion upon me. The burden of my guilt was
all gone and the devil suggested that I was worse than I had thought, that
my heart was so hard I could not mourn for my sins any more. Howbeit, the
dear Lord came to my rescue. He reminded me that my repentance was genuine,
and therefore accepted by him; and that all he required of me was to
exercise faith in his promises, and that if I could not do that