there are that we do for our friends which we should never do on our own
account!--such as making a request even an entreaty, of a man unworthy
of respect or inveighing against some person with a degree of
bitterness, nay, in terms of vehement reproach. In fine, we are
perfectly right in doing in behalf of a friend things that in our own
case would be decidedly unbecoming. There are also many ways in which
good men detract largely from their own comfort or suffer it to be
impaired, that a friend may have the enjoyment which they sacrifice. The
second opinion is that which limits kind offices and good will by the
rule of equality. This is simply making friendship a matter of
calculation with the view of keeping a debtor and creditor account
evenly balanced. To me friendship seems more affluent and generous and
not disposed to keep strict watch lest it may give more than it receives
and to fear that a part of its due may be spilled over or suffered to
leak out or that it may heap up its own measure over full in return.
[Footnote: We have here, first, a figure drawn from pecuniary accounts,
then one from liquid measure, then one from dry measure--all designed to
affix the brand of the most petty meanness on the (so called) friendship
which makes it a point neither to leave nor to brook a preponderance of
obligation on either side.] But worst of all is the third limit which
prescribes that friends shall take a man's opinion of himself as a
measure for their estimate and treatment of him. There are some persons
who are liable to fits of depression, or who have little hope of better
fortune than the present. In such a case, it is the part of a friend,
not to hold the position toward his friend which he holds toward
himself, but to make the efficient endeavor to rouse him from his
despondency, and to lead him to better hope and a more cheerful train of
thought. It remains for me then, to establish another limit of
friendship. But first let me tell you what Scipio was wont to speak of
with the severest censure. He maintained that no utterance could have