gentlemen."

I was directed to an office where a captain sat writing at a desk,
while an orderly waited rigidly at attention. The captain looked up as
I entered, took in my spats and velour hat with an impatient glance,
and continued with his writing. When I got an opportunity I presented
my letter; he read it through irritably.

"Any previous military experience?"

"None at all."

"Then how d'you expect to pass out with this class? It's been going
for nearly two weeks already?"

Again, as though he had dismissed me from his mind, he returned to his
writing. From a military standpoint I knew that I was justly a figure
of naught; but I also felt that he was rubbing it in a trifle hard. I
was too recent a recruit to have lost my civilian self-respect. At
last, after a period of embarrassed silence, I asked, "What am I to
do? To whom do I report?"

Without looking up he told me to report on the parade ground at six
o'clock the following morning. When I got back to my hotel, I
reflected on the chilliness of my reception. I had taken no credit to
myself for enlisting--I knew that I ought to have joined months
before. But six o'clock! I glanced across at the station, where trains
were pulling out for New York; for a moment I was tempted. But not for
long; I couldn't trust the hotel people to wake me, so I went out and
purchased an alarm clock.