affair she had already yielded to persuasion, and had permitted the
Captain to visit her again; and by-and-by the second resolution also
proved weak, and his visits were not confined to Wednesday evenings. She
had struggled against her unworthy feeling for him, and knowing that it
was unworthy, that the strength she prided herself so much on was
weakness where he was concerned, she was dissatisfied in mind and angry
with herself for making these concessions. She really believed in the
love he professed for her, and did not think much the worse of him for
being a man without income or occupation, and a gambler to boot; but she
feared that a marriage with him would only make her miserable, and
between her love for him, which could not be concealed, and the fear that
he would eventually win her consent to be his wife, her mind was in a
constant state of anxiety and restlessness. The little indiscretion he
had been guilty of with Fan she had forgiven in her heart: that he had
actually conceived a fondness for this poor young girl she could not
believe, for in that case he would have been very careful not to do
anything to betray it to the woman he wished to marry; but though she had
forgiven him, she was resolved not to let him know it just yet, and so
continued to be a little distant and formal in her manner, never calling
him by his christian name, "Jack," as formerly, and not allowing him to
call her "Pollie."

All this was nothing to Fan, as she very rarely saw him, but on the few
occasions when she accidentally met him, in the house or when out
walking, he always had that curious smile on his lips, and studied her
face with a bold searching look in his eyes, which made her uncomfortable
and even a little afraid.

One day, about the middle of December, Miss Starbrow began to speak to
her about her future.