it down to Kansas City, where th' cot beds come fr'm."

"Oh, ye're always pitchin' into some wan," said Mr. Hennessy. "I bet ye
Willum Jennings Bryan niver see th' platform befure it wint in. He's too
good a man."

"He is all iv that," said Mr. Dooley. "But ye bet he knows th' rale
platform f'r him is: 'Look at th' bad breaks Mack's made,' an' Mack's
platform is: 'Ye'd get worse if ye had Billy Bryan.' An' it depinds on
whether most iv th' voters ar-re tired out or on'y a little tired who's
ilicted. All excipt you, Hinnissy. Ye'll vote f'r Bryan?"

"I will," said Mr. Hennessy.

"Well," said Mr. Dooley, "d'ye know, I suspicted ye might."




THE YACHT RACES


"In th' ol' times whin I was a yachtsman--" began Mr. Dooley.

"Scowman," said Mr. Hennessy.

"Yachtsman," said Mr. Dooley. "Whin I was a yachtsman, all a man needed
to race was a flat-bottomed boat, an umbrella, an' a long dhrink. In
thim days 'twas 'Up with th' mainsail an' out with th' jib, an' Cap'n
Jawn first to th' Lake View pumpin' station f'r th' see-gars.' Now 'tis