"Where wud ye keep it?" asked the unsuspecting Hennessy.

"I'll put it out on th' vacant lot," said Mr. Dooley, "an' lave it grow
fat by atin' ol' bur-rd cages an' tin cans. I'll milk it hard, an' whin
'tis dhry I'll dispose iv it to th' widdies an' orphans iv th' Sixth
Ward that need household pets. Be hivins, if they give me half a chanst,
I'll be as gr-reat a fi-nanceer as anny man in Wall sthreet.

"Th' reason I'm so confident iv th' value iv Steel an' Wire stock,
Hinnissy, is they're goin' to hur-rl th' chairman iv th' comity into
jail. That's what th' pa-apers calls a ray iv hope in th' clouds iv
dipression that've covered th' market so long. 'Tis always a bull
argymint. 'Snowplows common was up two pints this mornin' on th' rumor
that th' prisidint was undher ar-rest.' 'They was a gr-reat bulge in
Lobster preferred caused be th' report that instead iv declarin' a
dividend iv three hundhred per cint. th' comp'ny was preparin' to
imprison th' boord iv directors.' 'We sthrongly ricommind th' purchase
iv Con and Founder. This comp'ny is in ixcillint condition since th'
hangin' iv th' comity on reorganization.'"

"What's th' la-ad been doin', Hinnissy? He's been lettin' his frinds in
on th' groun' flure--an' dhroppin' thim into th' cellar. Ye know
Cassidy, over in th' Fifth, him that was in th' ligislachure? Well, sir,
he was a gr-reat frind iv this man. They met down in Springfield whin
th' la-ad had something he wanted to get through that wud protect th'
widdies an' orphans iv th' counthry again their own avarice, an' he
must've handed Cassidy a good argymint, f'r Cassidy voted f'r th' bill,
though threatened with lynchin' be stockholders iv th' rival comp'ny. He
come back here so covered with dimons that wan night whin he was