presence; for, granting that we are always in the presence of
God, yet it seems to me that those who pray arc in His presence
in a very different sense; for they, as it were, see that He is
looking upon them; while others may be for days together without
even once recollecting that God sees them.

3. It is true, indeed, that during these years there were many
months, and, I believe, occasionally a whole year, in which I so
kept guard over myself that I did not offend our Lord, gave
myself much to prayer, and took some pains, and that
successfully, not to offend Him. I speak of this now, because
all I am saying is strictly true; but I remember very little of
those good days, and so they must have been few, while my evil
days were many. Still, the days that passed over without my
spending a great part of them in prayer were few, unless I was
very ill, or very much occupied.

4. When I was ill, I was well with God. I contrived that those
about me should be so, too, and I made supplications to our Lord
for this grace, and spoke frequently of Him. Thus, with the
exception of that year of which I have been speaking, during
eight-and-twenty years of prayer, I spent more than eighteen in
that strife and contention which arose out of my attempts to
reconcile God and the world. As to the other years, of which I
have now to speak, in them the grounds of the warfare, though it
was not slight, were changed; but inasmuch as I was--at least, I
think so--serving God, and aware of the vanity of the world, all
has been pleasant, as I shall show hereafter. [1]

5. The reason, then, of my telling this at so great a length is