"But how shall I see my father? Infinite pains have I taken to conceal
from him a storm which I thought could be easily averted, which his
knowledge of it would only render more difficult to resist; but my cursed
folly, by saying more than I intended to you, has blasted my designs."

I again expressed my regret for the rashness of my conduct, and
entreated him to think better of my father than to imagine him invincible
to argument. I promised to go to him in the morning, and counteract, as
much as I could, the effects of my evening conversation. At length he
departed, with somewhat renovated spirits, and left me to muse upon the
strange events of this day.

I could not free myself from the secret apprehension of having done
mischief rather than good by my compliance. I had acted without consulting
my mother, in a case where my youth and inexperience stood in the utmost
need of advice. On the most trivial occasions I had hitherto held it a
sacred duty to make her the arbitress and judge of my whole conduct; and
now shame for my own precipitance and regard for my brother's feelings
seemed to join in forbidding me to disclose what had passed. A most
restless and unquiet night did I pass.

Next morning was I to go to my father, to repair as much as possible
the breach I had thoughtlessly made in his happiness. I knew not what
means to employ for this purpose. What could I say? I was far from being
satisfied, myself, with my brother's representations. I hoped, but had
very little confidence that any thing in my power to do would be of
permanent advantage.

These doubts did not make me defer my visit. I was greatly surprised to