But the lawyer focused everyone's admiration on himself by telling them
all about Switzerland, that wonderful country, that model for all small
countries of the world. What social conditions, what a referendum, what
planning in the exploitation of the country's natural wonders! There they
had sanatoriums; there they knew how to deal with tourists! Tremendous!

"Yes, and what Swiss cheese," said the Associate Master. "It smells like
tourists' feet."

Dead silence. So Associate Master Hoey was prepared to go to such lengths!

"Well, what about Norwegian old-milk cheese?" said a Danish voice mildly.

"Yes, that's filthy stuff, too," Mr. Hoey replied. "Just the thing for
Schoolmaster Staur pontificating in his armchair."

Laughter.

Since matters were now smoothed over again, the lawyer could safely
continue:

"If we could only make such Swiss cheese here," he said, "we should not be
so poor. Generally speaking, I found after my modest investigations in
that country that they are ahead of us in every respect. We have
everything to learn from them: their frugality, their diligence, their
long working hours, the small home industries--"

"And so on," interrupted Associate Master Hoey. "All trifles, nothingness,
negativity! A country that exists thanks only to the mercy of its
neighbors ought not to be a model for any other country on earth. We must