workings in my thoughts, whole nights together, but now it is
other ways with me. When all are fast about me, and no eye
open, but His who ever waketh, my thoughts are upon things past,
upon the awful dispensation of the Lord towards us, upon His
wonderful power and might, in carrying of us through so many
difficulties, in returning us in safety, and suffering none to
hurt us. I remember in the night season, how the other day I
was in the midst of thousands of enemies, and nothing but death
before me. It is then hard work to persuade myself, that ever
I should be satisfied with bread again. But now we are fed with
the finest of the wheat, and, as I may say, with honey out of
the rock. Instead of the husk, we have the fatted calf. The
thoughts of these things in the particulars of them, and of the
love and goodness of God towards us, make it true of me, what
David said of himself, "I watered my Couch with my tears" (Psalm
6.6). Oh! the wonderful power of God that mine eyes have seen,
affording matter enough for my thoughts to run in, that when
others are sleeping mine eyes are weeping.

I have seen the extreme vanity of this world: One hour I have
been in health, and wealthy, wanting nothing. But the next hour
in sickness and wounds, and death, having nothing but sorrow and
affliction.

Before I knew what affliction meant, I was ready sometimes to
wish for it. When I lived in prosperity, having the comforts of
the world about me, my relations by me, my heart cheerful, and
taking little care for anything, and yet seeing many, whom I
preferred before myself, under many trials and afflictions, in
sickness, weakness, poverty, losses, crosses, and cares of the