regards himself as the greatest man in the country, who not only thinks
that he regulates every political intrigue in Spain and Portugal, but
assumes to give the direction of every military movement also, and tries
to dictate to the general on purely military matters--quietly cheeked by
an ensign, is the best thing I ever saw."

"But he has nothing to do with military matters, has he?"

"No more than that mule-driver there, but he thinks he has; and yet, even
in his own political line, he is the most ill-informed and gullible of
fools, even among the mass of incompetent agents who have done their
utmost to ruin every plan that has been formed. I doubt whether he has
ever been correct in a single statement that he has made, and am quite
sure that every prophecy he has ventured upon has been falsified, every
negotiation he has entered into has failed, and every report sent home to
government is useful only if it is assumed to be wrong in every
particular; and yet the man is so puffed up with pride and arrogance that
he is well-nigh insupportable. The Spaniards have fooled him to the top of
his bent; it has paid them to do so. Through his representations the
ministry at home have distributed millions among them. Arms enough have
been sent to furnish nearly every able-bodied man in Spain, and harm
rather than good has come of it. Still, he is a very great man, and our
generals are obliged to treat him with the greatest civility, and to
pretend to give grave consideration to the plans that, if they emanated
from any other man, would be considered as proofs that he was only fit for
a mad-house. And to see you looking calmly in his face and announcing your
views of the Spanish and Portuguese was delightful." And Captain Nelson
again burst into laughter at the recollection.

Terence joined in the laugh. "I had no intention of offending him," he