was gratified with a round of applause by way of offset to the
hisses. This event would have looked most horrible in
anticipation,--a thing to make a man shoot himself, or run amuck, or
hide himself in caverns where he might not see his own burning
blush; but the reality was not so very hard to bear. It is a fact
that I was more deeply grieved by an almost parallel misfortune
which happened to my companion on the same evening. In my own
behalf I was angry and excited, not depressed; my blood ran quick,
my spirits rose buoyantly, and I had never felt such a confidence of
future success and determination to achieve it as at that trying
moment. I resolved to persevere, if it were only to wring the
reluctant praise from my enemies.

Hitherto I had immensely underrated the difficulties of my idle
trade; now I recognized that it demanded nothing short of my whole
powers cultivated to the utmost, and exerted with the same
prodigality as if I were speaking for a great party or for the
nation at large on the floor of the Capitol. No talent or
attainment could come amiss; everything, indeed, was requisite,--
wide observation, varied knowledge, deep thoughts, and sparkling
ones; pathos and levity, and a mixture of both, like sunshine in a
raindrop; lofty imagination, veiling itself in the garb of common
life; and the practised art which alone could render these gifts,
and more than these, available. Not that I ever hoped to be thus
qualified. But my despair was no ignoble one; for, knowing the
impossibility of satisfying myself, even should the world be
satisfied, I did my best to overcome it; investigated the causes of
every defect; and strove, with patient stubbornness, to remove them
in the next attempt. It is one of my few sources of pride, that,
ridiculous as the object was, I followed it up with the firmness and