Which pierced him like a needle--
He summoned straight away
His sexton and his beadle.

(These men were men who could
Hold liberal opinions:
On Sundays they were good--
On week-days they were minions.)

"To HOPLEY PORTER go,
Your fare I will afford you--
Deal him a deadly blow,
And blessings shall reward you.

"But stay--I do not like
Undue assassination,
And so before you strike,
Make this communication:

"I'll give him this one chance--
If he'll more gaily bear him,
Play croquet, smoke, and dance,
I willingly will spare him."

They went, those minions true,
To Assesmilk-cum-Worter,
And told their errand to
The REVEREND HOPLEY PORTER.

"What?" said that reverend gent,