Helbeck of Bannisdale — Volume II by Mrs. Humphry Ward
page 85 of 279 (30%)
page 85 of 279 (30%)
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Meanwhile a number of new understandings were developing in Helbeck. His own nature was simple and concentrated, with little introspective power of the modern kind--even through all the passions and subtleties of his religion. Nevertheless his lover's sense revealed to him a good deal of what was going on in the semi-darkness of Laura's feelings and ideas. He divined this jealousy of his religious life that had taken possession of her since their return from the sea. He felt by sympathy that obscure pain of separation that tormented her. What was he to do?--what could he do? The change astonished him, for while they were at the sea, it seemed to him that she had accepted the situation with a remarkable resolution. But it also set him on new trains of thought; it roused in him a secret excitement, a vague hope. If her earlier mood had persisted; if amid the joys of their love she had continued to put the whole religious matter away from her, as many a girl with her training might and would have done--then indeed he must have resigned himself to a life-long difference and silence between them on these vital things. But, since she suffered--since she felt the need of that more intimate, more exquisite link--? Since she could not let it alone, but must needs wound herself and him----? Instinctively he felt the weakness of her intellectual defence. Once or twice he let himself imagine the capture of her little struggling soul, the break-down of her childish resistance, and felt the flooding of a joy, at once mystical and very human. But that natural chivalry and deep self-distrust he had once expressed to |
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