"How in thunder he was a goin' to _get_ in." And then he wanted to know
"if I wanted him squshed into jelly by comin' in by the side of it--or
if I thought he wuz a crane, that he could step over it or a stream
of water that he could run under it, or what else do you think?" He
hollered wildly.

"Wall," sez I, "you hadn't ort to got it fixed in that shape. I told
you what end to move first," sez I. "You have moved it in side-ways. It
would go in all right if you had started it the other way."

"Oh, yes! It would have been all right. You love to see me, Samantha,
with a stove in my arms. You love it dearly. I believe you would be
perfectly happy if you could see me a luggin' round stoves every day.
But I'll tell you one thing, if this dumb stove is ever moved either way
out of this door--if I ever get it into a room agin, it never shall
be stirred agin so much as a hair's breadth--not while I have got the
breath of life in me."

Sez I, "Hush! I hear somebody a-knockin' at the door."

"I won't hush. It is nothin' but dumb foolishness a movin' round stoves,
and if anybody don't believe it let 'em look at me--and let 'em look at
that stove set right here in the door as firm as a rock."

[Illustration: "WON'T YOU BE STILL?"]

Sez I agin in a whisper, "Do be still, and I'll let 'em in, I don't want
them to ketch you a talkin' so and a-actin'." "Wall, I want 'em to
ketch me, that is jest what I want 'em to do. If it is a man he'll say