"Some things we can't do; we can't stop the creakin' sounds of the
world's work; the big roar of the wheel of business that rolls through
the week days, can't be oiled into stillness; but Sundays they might get
a little rest Sunday is the only day of rest for thousands of men and
wimmen, nervous, pale, worn by their week's hard toil.

"The creakin' of the wheels of traffic are stopped on this day. They
could get a little of the rest they need to carry on the fight of life
to help support wife, child, father, husband; but religeon is too much
for 'em--the religeon that the Bible declares is mild, peacible, tender.
It clangs and bangs and whangs at 'em till the day of rest is a torment.

"Now the Lord wouldn't approve of this. I know He wouldn't, for He was
always tender and pitiful full of compassion. I called it religeon for
oritory, but it hain't religeon, it is a relict of old Barberism who,
under the cloak of Religeon, whipped quakers and hung prophetic souls,
that the secrets of Heaven had been revealed to, secrets hidden from the
coarser, more sensual vision."

Sez Deacon Garven: "I consider the bells as missionarys. They help
spread the Gospel."

"And," sez I, for I waz full of my subject, and kep him down to it all I
could, "Ralph S. Robinson has spread the Gospel over acres and acres of
land, and brung in droves and droves of sinners into the fold without
the help of church or steeple, let alone bells, and it seems es if he
ortn't to be tortured to death now by 'em."

"Wall," he said, "he viewed 'em as Gospel means, and he couldn't, with