"The only thing I had to console me for all this was Clarence Hervey's
opinion that I looked better in man's clothes than my friend Harriot
Freke. Clarence was charmed with my spirit and grace; but he had not
leisure at that time to attach himself seriously to me, or to any thing.
He was then about nineteen or twenty: he was all vivacity, presumption,
and paradox; he was enthusiastic in support of his opinions; but he was at
the same time the most candid man in the world, for there was no set of
tenets which could be called exclusively his: he adopted in liberal
rotation every possible absurdity; and, to do him justice, defended each
in its turn with the most ingenious arguments that could be devised, and
with a flow of words which charmed the ear, if not the sense. His essay on
female duelling was a most extraordinary performance; it was handed about
in manuscript till it was worn out; he talked of publishing it, and
dedicating it to me. However, this scheme, amongst a million of others, he
_talked of_, but never put into execution. Luckily for him, many of his
follies evaporated in words. I saw but little either of him or his follies
at this time. All I know about him is, that after he had lost his bet of a
hundred guineas, as a pig-driver, by his knight-errantry in rescuing the
female duellists from a mob, he wrote a very charming copy of verses upon
the occasion; and that he was so much provoked by the stupidity of some of
his brother officers who could not understand the verses, that he took a
disgust to the army, and sold his commission. He set out upon a tour to
the continent, and I returned with Harriot Freke to London, and forgot the
existence of such a person as Clarence Hervey for three or four years.
Unless people can be of some use, or unless they are actually present, let
them be ever so agreeable or meritorious, we are very apt to forget them.
One grows strangely selfish by living in the world: 'tis a perfect cure
for romantic notions of gratitude, and love, and so forth. If I had lived
in the country in an old manor-house, Clarence Hervey would have doubtless