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Punchinello, Volume 1, No. 02, April 9, 1870 by Various
page 21 of 78 (26%)
_Enter Original Coram_. (_Aside_.) "I am WALTER CORAM; but I
can't prove it, the villains having taken my other handkerchief. (_To the
Banker_.) Sir, you once gave me a penny, and you have since embezzled my
fortune. How can I repay such noble conduct? Here is a bag of gold. Take it
and pay your creditors."

_Scene_ 2. _Enter Unprincipled Clerk and Comic Villain_.

_Unprincipled Clerk_. "The original CORAM has turned up. We must turn
him down again. I will burn him in his bed to-night."

_Comic Villain_. "Burn him; but don't attempt any violence." (_Swears
and smashes in his hat_.)

_Scene_ 4. _Enter Original Coram_. "I am WALTER COHAM; but I
can't prove it--I forget precisely why. What is this in my coffee? Opium!
It is, by SIVA, VISHNU, and others! They would fain drug my drink. Ha! Ha!
I have drank, eaten, smoked, chewed, and snuffed opium for ninety years. I
like it. So did my parents. I am, so to speak, the child of poppy. Ha! What
do I see? Flames twenty feet high all around me! Can this be fire? The
wretches mean to burn me alive! (_Aside_--And they'll do it too, some
night, if Moss don't keep a sharp look-out after those lazy carpenters.)"

_Enter Miss Effie German_. (_Aside_.) "I must get on the roof and
drag CORAM out. I hate to do it; for I shall have to show my ankles in
these horrid trowsers. But I suppose I must." (_Gets on the roof with
Comic Villain's Daughter, shows ankles, lifts up roof and saves Coram, amid
whirlwinds of applause and smoke.--Curtain_)

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