No sooner did Joseph Andrews perceive the distress of his friend, when
first the quick-scenting dogs attacked him, than he grasped his cudgel
in his right hand--a cudgel which his father had of his grandfather, to
whom a mighty strong man of Kent had given it for a present in that day
when he broke three heads on the stage. It was a cudgel of mighty
strength and wonderful art, made by one of Mr Deard's best workmen, whom
no other artificer can equal, and who hath made all those sticks which
the beaus have lately walked with about the Park in a morning; but this
was far his masterpiece. On its head was engraved a nose and chin, which
might have been mistaken for a pair of nutcrackers. The learned have
imagined it designed to represent the Gorgon; but it was in fact copied
from the face of a certain long English baronet, of infinite wit, humour,
and gravity. He did intend to have engraved here many histories: as the
first night of Captain B----'s play, where you would have seen critics
in embroidery transplanted from the boxes to the pit, whose ancient
inhabitants were exalted to the galleries, where they played on
catcalls. He did intend to have painted an auction room, where Mr Cock
would have appeared aloft in his pulpit, trumpeting forth the praises of
a china basin, and with astonishment wondering that "Nobody bids more
for that fine, that superb--" He did intend to have engraved many other
things, but was forced to leave all out for want of room.

No sooner had Joseph grasped his cudgel in his hands than lightning
darted from his eyes; and the heroick youth, swift of foot, ran with the
utmost speed to his friend's assistance. He overtook him just as
Rockwood had laid hold of the skirt of his cassock, which, being torn,
hung to the ground. Reader, we would make a simile on this occasion, but
for two reasons: the first is, it would interrupt the description, which
should be rapid in this part; but that doth not weigh much, many
precedents occurring for such an interruption: the second and much the