[Illustration: THE BLOOD-MONEY.

_Dr. Schenck._ "HOW IS UNCLE SAM'S INCOME PULSE?"

_Dr. Delano._ "VERY LOW. WE HAVE BLED HIM PRETTY FREELY, BUT MUST KEEP
BLEEDING HIM TO THE LAST DROP."]

* * * * *

LINES BY A HAPLESS SWAIN.

In ancient times, when suitors went to woo,
And heartless maids would send them hopeless back,
Lest the fond swains their courtship should renew,
The cruel belles would tender them the "sack."

And if one dared again renew the suit,
By ill success made desperate and bolder,
He fared still worse. From pa he gets a boot,
From her poor fellow!--only a cold shoulder.

Our modern usage in the Court of Love
Is, when the youth by some fair maid is smitten.
In token of his suit he sends a glove;
His suit rejected--she returns a "mitten."

Such is my hapless case, oh! cruel fair
Who sent this mitten--emblem of my fate;
But why the dickens didn't you send a pair--