verses are very pretty, but the morals of our paper must be preserved.

_U.S.G._--The expression, "The United States is at peace," is
ungrammatical, but you did perfectly right in writing to Punchinello
before believing it.

_Susan B. Anth-ny._--You are mistaken. DARWIN nowhere mentions any
process of natural selection by which a woman may in time become a man.

_Hon. Benj. Disraeli._--The expression, "I will put a head on you,"
which you say Prof. G-LDW-N SM-TH uses in a cable dispatch to you, is
merely a slang phrase which he has probably learned from his trainer.

_Payne Collier._--There is more than one Irishman in SHAKSPEARE. It
appears from the text of _Hamlet_ that he was on the most friendly terms
with the "melancholy Dane," from the familiar way in which the latter
addresses him:

_Ham._ "Now might I do it, PAT." _(Hamlet, Act III, Scene III.)_

It is impossible to say now whether the PAT in question was a Fenian or
not.

_Jack Ketch._--We think that listening to a debate in the House of
Representatives may fairly be considered the worst form of Capitol
punishment.

_Potter._--No, no. COLENSO was born in England. Though he was Bishop of
Natal, it was not his Natal place.