crutchalated; [C] but all must concede that she "went". Now whither did
she "went"? Ah! methinks your brain is puzzled. Why, she "went to the
Cupboard," says our author, who, perhaps, just then took a ten-cent nip.
She did not go around it, or about it, or upon it, or under it. She did
not let it come to her, but she went herself to the above-mentioned and
fore-named Cupboard.

Now, when a woman undertakes to do a thing, she has always a reason for
her undertaking; argoul, as my friend, the grave-digger, said, the
heroine of this Epic must have had an object in view. Otherwise, what
would take her to the Cupboard? She was evidently a strong-minded woman,
and would not fritter away her valuable time for nothing. To the
Cupboard she went "to get her poor dog a bone," says the author,
following out the logical sequence of the plot. The hero of the tail was
not in the Cupboard. Of course not. The "bone" was there. Ah! but _was_
the bone there? The sequel will show.

Just imagine the mild complacency, the unutterable sympathy, the
affectionate lovingness of the heroine for her hero! And with what
gentle expression she speaks of him--"her poor dog." Verily, must there
have been an abyss of kindly feeling in that Old Dame's large heart for
her poor dog!

But alas! for human care and anxiety. Away ye smiles and hopes.

"L'homme propose, mais Dieu dispose."[D]

In other words, when she got there, to the Cupboard, and peered into its
dark recesses, and searched the hidden corners of its many shelves, "the
Cupboard was bare."