altogether unmerited, because I saw not my Maker's image, either in man,
woman, or child, high or low, rich or poor, whom, comparatively, I loved
not as myself.--Would to heaven, my dear, that you were married!
Perhaps, then, you could have induced Mr. Hickman to afford me
protection, till these storms were over-blown. But then this might have
involved him in difficulties and dangers; and that I would not have done
for the world.

I don't know what to do, not I!--God forgive me, but I am very impatient!
I wish--But I don't know what to wish, without a sin!--Yet I wish it
would please God to take me to his mercy!--I can meet with none here--
What a world is this!--What is there in it desirable? The good we hope
for, so strangely mixed, that one knows not what to wish for! And one
half of mankind tormenting the other, and being tormented themselves in
tormenting!--For here is this my particular case, my relations cannot be
happy, though they make me unhappy!--Except my brother and sister, indeed
--and they seem to take delight in and enjoy the mischief they make.

But it is time to lay down my pen, since my ink runs nothing but gall.



LETTER IX

MISS CLARISSA HARLOWE, TO MISS HOWE
FRIDAY MORNING, SIX O'CLOCK

Mrs. Betty tells me, there is now nothing talked of but of my going to
my uncle Antony's. She has been ordered, she says, to get ready to
attend me thither: and, upon my expressing my averseness to go, had the