seats on both sides of the house, and an epitaph over the home
rule bill. Recreation: St. Andrew's golf and writing deep
books.

BALZAC, H., a Frenchman who wrote a few Parisian stories which
may be discussed in respectable company.

BARBAROSSA, Kaiser, the only emperor of Germany who ever went
to sleep.

BARKIS. Fame rested only upon his complete willingness.

BARLEYCORN, John, an eminent citizen of the world. Spent early
days in the fields, breweries, and distilleries. Later resided
in cellars. John had a red nose. Was a great friend of
Bacchus. He was a "wasser," he is an "iser," and he will be a
"will be-er." Ambition: The end of temperance societies.

BARNUM, Phineas T., fathered the introduction of the peanut,
the clown, and the beautiful bareback riders. As a side show
he taught that some Americans were Progressives part of the
time; that other Americans were Republicans all the time, but
that all Americans were not Democrats all the time.

BARRY, Madame Du, writers' model, former queen of France. Was
a great friend of Louis XV. and helped make the dances at
Versailles a success. She always preferred marcel waves to
pompadours. Ambition: To have and to hold. Address: See
Louis. Clubs: Anti-suffragette.