nothing on this side of eternity shall give me greater transport; but I
shall never think of purchasing your hand by any arts unworthy of a man,
and, I will add, of a Christian. There is one thing, my dear, which I
earnestly request of you, and it is this: that you would soon either put
an end to my hopes by a peremptory refusal, or cure me of my fears by a
generous consent.

It would oblige me much if you would send me a line or two when
convenient. I shall only add, further, that if behaviour, regulated
(though perhaps but very imperfectly) by the rules of honour and virtue,
if a heart devoted to love and esteem you, and an earnest endeavour to
promote your happiness; if these are qualities you would wish in a
friend, in a husband, I hope you shall ever find them in your real
friend and sincere lover.

* * * * *

V.-To ELLISON BEGBOE.

[LOCHLIE, 1781.]

I ought, in good manners, to have acknowledged the receipt of your
letter before this time, but my heart was so shocked with the contents
of it, that I can scarcely yet collect my thoughts so as to write you on
the subject. I will not attempt to describe what I felt on receiving
your letter. I read it over and over, again and again, and though it was
in the politest language of refusal, still it was peremptory; "you were
sorry you could not make me a return, but you wish me" what, without
you, I never can obtain, "you wish me all kind of happiness." It would
be weak and unmanly to say that without you I never can be happy; but