_When one man will not suit or stay,
Then get another, right away."_

* * * * *

CABLE NEWS.

[EXCLUSIVELY FOR PUNCHINELLO.]

GREAT BRITAIN.

The Great PUNCHINELLO dinner has come off! JENKINS was there, and was to
have telegraphed an account. But he was not so well as usual the next
day, the Thames water having got into his head. JENKINS never _could_
take much water. So your correspondent is obliged to trust to his
memory--unaffected by the water, which he did not take.

Old London Tavern was the scene of this banquet, given by the _literati_
of England in honor of the long-wished-for coming of PUNCHINELLO. The
dining-hall was decorated for the occasion with appropriate portraits.
There were HOGARTH, CERVANTES, ADDISON, MOLIERE, SWIFT, STERNE,
GOLDSMITH, TOM HOOD, IRVING, THACKERAY, DICKENS, and ARTEMUS WARD. A
number of the waiters were costumed in character. From my seat, I
recognized SAM WELLER, (right behind me;) the Fat Boy of _Pickwick;_
SANCHO PANZA, and JEAMES YELLOWPLUSH.

Mr. PUNCH was represented at the head of the table so well that you
could know him at once from his weekly frontispiece. On one side of him
sat CHARLES DICKENS; on the other, your humble ambassador. It would be